When ADD and Anxiety Collide

I'm trying.

Trying to focus

To think

To breathe

To work

But I can't.

My head spins

Jumbles up all

I was going to write

My breaths stop

My heart stops yet races

And I just can't think

I just can't breathe

I just can't.

I want to be normal.

To focus and not sink

To breathe and not feel rushed

To feel like I'm good enough

But I can't.

I'm not normal.

It'd be so easy to be normal.

To focus and control distraction.

To work and not panic.

To think and not have jumbled thoughts.

Why can't I just be normal?

I can't focus

It's like locusts

Jumping through my head

Jumbling up my focus

My words

My sanity.

I'm tired of being distracted

But I can't help it.

It's out of my control

And the blame is put on me.

I can't stop.

Anxiety

I can't breathe.

Waves of anxiety

Crash over me

Dragging me out to sea.

I can't see.

The rolling waves

Cloud my vision.

I can't make a decision.

Nothing is clear.

Which way is up

Which way is down

I can not tell.

It's like a prison cell.

No one can hear.

I'm told to speak louder,

But my screams are drowned out

By the crashing of waves.

This is my mind every day.

Everything I'm too afraid to say.

My mind on constant replay

Of what went wrong each day.

From the moment I wake up,

There is no delay.

"I can do all things through

Christ who strengthens me."

But some days I can't see

The blazing light in front of me.

I can't see His eyes in front of me.

Enough is Enough

Work together and

Vote for those

Who will represent us.

Protect us.

Listen to us.

Not go against us.

Our voices deserve

To be heard.

Enough is enough

Protect and serve.

No one else

Needs to get hurt. 

When a minor protests,

They are not just a kid.

They are the future.

A future trying

To save lives.

No one else dies.

No more cries.

No more empty

Promises of action.

Something needs

To get done.

Open their eyes

To hear their

Peoples' cries.

They are not lies.

Not fake news.

How many more

Have to die?

Safe

I want to do something,

But I don't hear a thing

About what I can do.

Seventeen minutes outside.

That's a start.

But that doesn't make

Those closed off to opinion

Hear any better.

Lives are lost.

Friends,

Family,

Gone.

We are doing some things,

But how many in power are listening?

Are we debating with a wall

Or breaking through?

Schools are a place to learn,

Music festivals to have fun,

Gay nightclubs to be who you are,

Churches to worship.

No one should live in fear

Of getting hurt.

I want to do more,

But where can I start?

To Be Authentic

To be authentic

You have to be vulnerable.

To be vulnerable

You have to be trusting.

To be trusting

You have to give up time.

To give up time

You have to sacrifice.

To sacrifice

You have to care.